Time For Some Cyber Ethics Parents!

The latest MMS scam in India has got me really worried. First, it occurred in an institute of higher studies, so presumably the executors and the victim had all crossed their troubled teens. Second, it shows that girls can equal, and even beat boys, in initiating and enjoying abusive activities. And third, but most important, the senior girls thought nothing about disrobing the junior, clicking her snap and then circulating it via MMS!

As a Mother of two kids who are soon going to join some or the other institute for higher studies and already have started dreaming about hostel life, I am worried with a capital W.

I shuddered to think something similar happening to my kiddos and the “what ifs?” gave me restless sleeps for a few nights. Interspersed with the concern for my children, was the empathy for the parents of the girl whose daughter was the victim. Their pain and anger at their daughter’s suffering and shame must know no bounds.

However, I felt more keenly for parents of the girls who created the MMS scandal. I could imagine what they were probably going through-the numbing shock and the total disbelief at what their beloved daughters had done. The top question in their mind would be, “But why did my daughter do it? Where had I gone wrong in my parenting?”

My heart yearned to reach out to them and assure them that they were not at fault, but perhaps they had missed out on instilling a sense of ethical behaviour in their girls?

We Indians take great pride in instilling the high values in our children that our elders had passed on to us. But our elders did not have computers, and so they could not teach us about cyber ethics, and we too sadly, have never given it a thought.

What is cyber ethics? It is an extension of the ethical values that we give to our children. Just like we teach kids to have, and follow, good principles like being just, honest and polite in our interactions and actions, similarly we must teach them about the unsafe world called cyber space and the ethics to be practiced there.

Here are a few you could use in your discussion on ethics:

–  Do not post any mean or salacious comments about anyone, or upload inappropriate photographs of others on social networking sites, IMS and MMS

–  Never make a remark about anybody on the net or via mobile phone, which you would not like to hear about yourself

–  Do not forward purportedly religious mails/fear mails that threaten you with dire consequences if you do not forward them. You may be overloading somebody’s mailbox and helping to send Spam

–  Just like it is not nice to read another’s letter on the sly, it is bad manners to secretly access and check out somebody else’s personal site and data

–  Desist from using your technical expertise to hack accounts. In plain words, it is stealing.

–  Do not morph photos and post them, your own or otherwise, for fun or out of spite. You may later forget the incident, but somebody else might access it and make wrong use of it.

There are of course many more, but I think these offer a good platform to start from. Remember though not to turn the discussions into moral science classes. Though words and deeds, teach your child values that will help them mature into responsible adults.

Anindita
cybermumindia@mcafee.com
Follow on Twitter @Cybermum_India

Tags: kids online behavior, online ethics

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